Category: grief

  • How I Feel About Dating

  • Silver Linings

    Funny how catastrophes can illuminate the past to make it seem glorious. How they can demand action. I was bitching a while back about how life is my problem, how I struggle with loving it and wanting it. And then some folks in China decide to eat exotic meat that carries a deadly virus, their […]

  • I’ve Lost the Light… I Don’t Know Where

    Some dude on Bumble (because I am that idiotic hopeless romantic and can’t hold onto my resolve any better than I can hold onto a dollar bill): Your blog made me laugh. Kind of wondering what I have to do to be a subject.Me: My blog made you laugh? That’s good because I’ve been feeling […]

  • bah humbug

    weeks ago — before thanksgiving — i bought a tiny christmas tree for my room. it stayed in the bag in my trunk until tonight. i was in heb getting a plant as a housewarming gift for a dude i’d been talking to for a couple of weeks — i’d chosen not to get a […]

  • it should be enough…

    me: are you okay if i’m in jeans and a t-shirt? bumbler: yes, i prefer it. days later… me: what sort of woman do you seek, and where do i fall short in comparison? bumbler: you wore a t-shirt and brought a backpack with you on our date. that’s fine, but it doesn’t really suggest […]

  • the unreliable narrator

    i don’t know how old i was when i learned i had cerebral palsy. i suspect it was when i was ten, when i had to have the third of six surgeries… the first one i was old enough to remember. i had a navel hernia — something to do with the abdominal wall and […]

  • mercy

    i used to imagine were i to get married what my wedding would be like. most of the time i envisioned it at a catholic church in the woodlands, not far from where i live, and because my father is who is and is so well-loved by so many, i doubt very much the guest […]

  • let there be light

    my aunt killed herself on wednesday. i have always viewed my brother’s death as a suicide — but his method was painstaking and debilitating. he drank and drank and drank until his body said enough, and it took about a decade for that end to come. i lost my brother a long time ago, but […]

  • hogwash

    speaking of men… sunday. some dude emails me on match: hey beautiful! how’s your day going? i’m joe* and you are?joe’s profile stats say he’s in florida, but his headline says he’s a midwest guy new to the west coast. the second sentence in his about me section says that he’s recently settled in louisiana… […]

  • a sadness i can’t erase

    not even the trees hootie and the blowfish someone please talk to me ’cause i feel you cry and you’re sitting with him, and i know i’ll never see you again… i wonder if you’re looking down at me and smiling right now i wanna know if it’s true when he looks at me, won’t you tell me does […]